The day in tweets for 2012-04-16 from The Smiling Assassin

  • Would still love to get Chelsea in the final, just so we can now shut their fans, as well as their players, up. #

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The week in tweets for this past week from The Smiling Assassin

  • Apologies for the swearing earlier. Think I've mentally recovered everything I'd written. The #masters playoff appears to be calming me down #
  • That black guy at the #masters didn't stick out at all then, did he? #
  • Can exclusively reveal that Kenny Dalglish HAS picked a team for tonight. #itk #
  • If Derry got a straight red, why is he only serving a one game ban? The FA; so incompetent they can't even enforce their own rules properly. #
  • I presume that it is QI's Alan Davies that was just mentioned in @HJC_Official 's last tweet? #
  • @PGJMatthews You are asking if I understand The FA's thought processes, to which the answer to that is no. #
  • Thanks for responses Re. Alan Davies & Derry's ban. And thank you to those who'll still be replying in a couple of hours :-) #
  • Derry's was a professional "foul", though how brushing someone's hand across an opponents shirt can be considered a foul is beyond me… #
  • And it sounds as if the whole stupid idiot act Alan Davies plays on QI isn't necessarily much of an act. #neverbeenanfanofhis #
  • Does someone know exactly what Alan Davies tweeted? Not going to get the pitchforks out until I know full story. #
  • Thanks to @RedPMcG for the AD link. No defending any of what he said frankly. Hope it goes mainstream and costs the unfunny twat big time. #
  • Annie Eaves; the Samantha Brick of Sports Journalism #dontfeedthetroll #
  • A 4-5-1 with Spearing holding, Shelvey & Henderson in the middle and Maxi & Bellamy supporting Carroll makes the most sense. #
  • Though it is an XI that absolutely reeks of saving players for the Semi on Saturday. Hopeful we can still get a result. #
  • @Emperor_Kenzo we've played well most the season, winning has been the issue though. #
  • Good start so far, I must say. More play like that and we'll be fine tonight. #
  • Cant comment on Doni's ability but the sleeves on his shirt are far, far too short. #
  • Some decent football so far, lack of penetration so far. Poor defending from Flanaghan though. #
  • And as I type about lack of penetration, Maxi scores a tap-in. Am about a minute behind #damnyouskygo #
  • Play the Maxi and he will score. #
  • Shelvey & Henderson in the middle are, so far, looking absolutely awesome together. Both could potentially be Gerrard's replacement. #
  • Hate to say it but Flanno off is the right decision. Come on Brad, do us proud fella. #
  • Someone should have told Yakubu that the reward for scoring was a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts. He'd have absolutely smashed it then. #
  • You leave any player, even Yakubu, that free in the area, they'll punish you. Poor from #LFC #
  • Thank the lord that's over. I'm spent. Wait, there's a second half? #
  • Yakubu's penalty may have been poor but it still needed saving. Could make a huge difference in an hour's time. #
  • Going to do a Storify "story" of tonight's game later. Might take me as long as the game itself to type it up properly.. #
  • Not that you type a Storify story but still ALOT to report on. #
  • Right, let's try again shall we? #
  • My brother in law has just suggested that Daniel Agger looks like The Miz. Well, he is awesome. #workwithwhatimgiven #
  • Craig Bellamy's training session with Tom Daley earlier was well worth it then? #bitobviouscraig #
  • Wrong end Andy. #
  • Andy Carroll, you gorgeous lanky Geordie. #
  • I presume BRFC fans are back to their routine of hating Steve Kean again? #
  • Andy Burton interviewing Kenny; always good for a laugh… #
  • Coming to DVD in June; the best of Kenny Dalglish vs Andy Burton, Vol. 1. #
  • Read my #Storify story of last night: "Blackburn Vs. Liverpool – April 10th 2012" http://t.co/VxciHIbS #storify #lfc #
  • Mentioned quite a few of you in a story of last nights game, too many to mention anyway http://t.co/KiaviAai #
  • Comolli's sac… Sorry, "departure by mutual consent" is clearly a warning shot to Kenny. #
  • He deserves another season, regardless of what happens on Saturday, because early on in the season we played some tidy football. #
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The day in tweets for 2012-04-15 from The Smiling Assassin

  • Ok, now I'm nervous. #
  • Chris Waddle commentating on this means we're certain to see a Pelanty. #
  • Nice of Stevie G to give Howard Webb an early touch of the ball. #
  • Excellent tracking back and closing down from #LFC so far. Basic stuff but still nice to see. #
  • Told you we wouldn't keep a clean sheet didn't I? #
  • As for Carragher, sorry fella but your time is up. #
  • JC did something similar a few minutes before; instead of passing it he paused and invited EFC pressure when he had 2 passes on. #
  • The various people that have fed Carragher's ego over the last few years haven't exactly helped either. #
  • Why is Carragher putting his foot on the ball and waiting for a pass? Does he honestly think that no-one from #EFC wont close him down? #
  • Would be alright if he didn't do it EVERY SINGLE TIME. And then plays it back to Brad Jones which invites more pressure. #
  • EFC not exactly being subtle either; any time ball goes to a defender, 2 players swarm on them to put pressure on. #
  • EFC done nothing except what we've given them. Most of it been given by Jamie Carragher. #
  • Up until the EFC goal, I thought we were doing fine. EFC are now just going to sit back and defend their lead. #
  • Get a goal back and that'll stir EFC out of their shell. Then just start hitting them on the counter attack as quickly as possible. #
  • They aren't a quick side and even like of Luis, who isn't the quickest, could unlock their defence. As could Bellamy for that matter. #
  • Still, on the plus side, I did get Jelavic as first scorer right. Just need 3 #LFC goals in the 2nd for that bet to win. #
  • If you wanted to, you could put Glen at LB, Carra at RB and have Agger & Skrtel at CB. Not ideal but he's less of a liabilty then. #
  • But that then frees up Leighton Baines to bomb forward and start whipping in crosses. Which wouldn't be ideal. #
  • Amazing just how little Geuye (sp?) and Baines have done on the left for EFC. Not that they NEED to do anything mind you… #
  • Thought in the first half but this Wembley pitch looks a bit 'slow" #
  • For those Seinfeld fans amongst you, that was Everton regifting their goal back to us. Tidy finish as well. 1-1. #
  • Distin has money on 3-1 to LFC as well #justsaying #
  • JUST FUCKING PASS THE BALL FIRST TIME JAMIE. YOU ARE NOT JOE FUCKING MADDEN OR XABI TWATTING ALONSO!!! #
  • Sorry about that, feel better now. Still 1-1. #
  • Only one more goal in this I think, sadly. #
  • I stand corrected, Maxi's coming on so possibly at least a couple in it. #
  • Good hands from Brad Jones. Eventually. #
  • Great footwork from Andy Carroll there. Finish just lacking. #
  • Can't fault Andy Carroll for effort today. No end product but clearly working hard. #
  • Jamie Carragher in doing something calmly and correctly shocker. #
  • The two wingers who perhaps should have started the game are both now on. 6 mins to go, 1-1. #
  • Now get another please #greedy #
  • David Moyes #notwinning #
  • I won nothing on the FA Cup game and I won nothing on the National. Do I care? Not really. Liverpool won, that's fine by me. #
  • As for who I want in the final, Chelsea all the way for me. For some fairly obvious reasons! #

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The day in tweets for 2012-04-14 from The Smiling Assassin

  • Got a good feeling about 3-1 to #LFC tomorrow. No idea why though. #
  • Got my betting sorted for the Grand National and the cup semi. That's £15 I'm never seeing again… #betting #amugsgame #
  • @GeorgeGardner12 give my betting track record that's highly unlikely :-) #
  • Interesting that so many people are nervous before the game. Personally, I'm quite calm. Wont be at 12.25 tomorrow afternoon though. #
  • @SiClancy Frankly, we usually play better when they're not there. Not hugely better but enough to make a difference! #fixedforgrammar #
  • Paddy Power's Money Back Special of refunding bets if there is a red card in the game tomorrow mean they aren't going to make much money. #
  • Certainly encouraged me to put a couple of extra bets down. #
  • My bets should anyone care is 3-1 LFC @ 19-1; Suarez, Maxi & Jelavic to score first & LFC to win 3-1 @ 75, 125 & 175-1 respectively. #
  • @Joseph_Donaghy Any red card in normal time, extra time doesn't count. #
  • A lot of talk about how Henry & Werner wont be at Wembley tomorrow. After everything that's happened this week, probably for the best. #
  • @Skythanil it's called a "scorecast" bet; it's a separate single bet. #
  • @Skythanil usually put a couple of quid on a scorecast bet each game; they rarely win but if they do, the rewards are worth the wait! #
  • @pauledwards1973 It's Everton, in a cup semi. If Kenny can't get a performance given those circumstances…. #
  • The fact that despite our "indifferent" performances this season we've managed to beat Eve*ton twice and yet to concede against them… #
  • Suggests that even with a third choice keeper in goal, we should (SHOULD) be fine. Don't expect a clean sheet though. #

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The day in tweets for 2012-04-13 from The Smiling Assassin

  • Comolli's sac… Sorry, "departure by mutual consent" is clearly a warning shot to Kenny. #
  • He deserves another season, regardless of what happens on Saturday, because early on in the season we played some tidy football. #
  • As I've said ad naesuem, we only need a couple of players and a slightly more ruthless edge and we'll be challenging for top 4 next season. #
  • As I said, a more ruthless edge… RT @thisisanfield IF all 22 of #LFC #039;s shots that hit the woodwork had gone in, they would be 5th in PL. #
  • Always found it odd that Kenny & Comolli shared joint top billing at top of list on staff pages. Almost as if both had equal power perhaps? #
  • Not that it's important now but always found it odd. #
  • Steve Clarke will be the next to go I'd imagine, particularly if rumours of Maureenho coming back to England next season are true. #
  • And in case anyone has had a sense of humour bypass, I'm aware it's MOURINHO, not Maureenho. Thanks. #
  • Wow, this is the most mental I've seen my timeline since at least Tuesday. #
  • The idea of Kenny and Johan Cruyff together as players is enough to give me a semi. As a management duo, less so. Considerably less so. #
  • Both, as managers, are considerably headstrong & both want their own way. After all, that is partly why Cruyff has just left Ajax isn't it? #
  • I think Cruyff's "halo" has waned alot since the early 90s and the Barca dream team. Would he give a monkey's about #LFC #
  • David Dein arguably more "use" to LFC right now; excellent negotiator, gets on well with The FA. And god knows we need that right now… #
  • Both would be amazing but Dein I think will edge it, particularly as @propagandaphoto was first to spot him at last 2 #LFC games. #
  • If this BBC announcement is that Inter Milan may bid for Gareth Bale, I will hit someone at BBC Sport very, very hard in the face. #
  • @markjepson I saw that as well, great minds and all that… #
  • @Raven_Risoliere I smelt bullshit from the second Ian Prior first teased it. Blocked him soon after. #
  • @chriswvtr @markjepson Why, you want to join us? #nohomo #
  • @chriswvtr @markjepson Good, you learned you lesson then. #
  • @dinabass he'd just clash with Kenny, which is why it'll never happen. #
  • @dinabass I also think Van Gaal is very, very overrated. #
  • Have to say that @JohnSinnott has been quiet these last few hours. Wonder if he knows anything about possible BBC #LFC story? #
  • @AdamBrooks1 well, at the moment, nothing is going on so you're not missing anything. #
  • Phil Gartside needs to change his Twitter bio; "fan and very proud chairman of BWFC, Professional troll" #
  • If I remember correctly, the BBC needs to have 2 seperate sources before they can run a story. Looking for a second source explains delay? #
  • @LiverpoolFC_18 very unlikely BBC would run rumours, probably wanting to make sure they HAVE a story before running it. #
  • This, by @feintzebra, is excellent http://t.co/kVFU1fod #
  • Lets be honest, that BBC story was always going to be something of a damp squib. As I said earlier, not sure Cruyff is what we need. #
  • What I forgot to add in that last tweet was that it was always going to something of a damp squib at this time of night. #
  • @jmswain49 It'll be like Dirk "Kite/Kout/Kuyt" all over again #
  • Cruyff may well be linked but David Dein still strikes me as the more logical choice. Maybe not as a DoF but possibly a CEO type role… #
  • Acts as a go between for Kenny & JWH; allows both both men to do their jobs while he can take of running the club. #
  • Probably the only inches she's getting #twentyfivepinter RT @Quaaam The Daily Mail are still giving the Brick woman paper inches? #
  • Now I know Henry Winter ghost wrote Kenny's book, his articles on LFC have taken on an interesting light. He's still a tit mind you. #
  • HW: "what Liverpool need first is a strong chief executive running the club, dovetailing with KD yet calling him to account at times." #
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The day in tweets for 2012-04-12 from The Smiling Assassin

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The day in tweets for 2012-04-11 from The Smiling Assassin

  • Can exclusively reveal that Kenny Dalglish HAS picked a team for tonight. #itk #
  • If Derry got a straight red, why is he only serving a one game ban? The FA; so incompetent they can't even enforce their own rules properly. #
  • I presume that it is QI's Alan Davies that was just mentioned in @HJC_Official 's last tweet? #
  • @PGJMatthews You are asking if I understand The FA's thought processes, to which the answer to that is no. #
  • Thanks for responses Re. Alan Davies & Derry's ban. And thank you to those who'll still be replying in a couple of hours :-) #
  • Derry's was a professional "foul", though how brushing someone's hand across an opponents shirt can be considered a foul is beyond me… #
  • And it sounds as if the whole stupid idiot act Alan Davies plays on QI isn't necessarily much of an act. #neverbeenanfanofhis #
  • Does someone know exactly what Alan Davies tweeted? Not going to get the pitchforks out until I know full story. #
  • Thanks to @RedPMcG for the AD link. No defending any of what he said frankly. Hope it goes mainstream and costs the unfunny twat big time. #
  • Annie Eaves; the Samantha Brick of Sports Journalism #dontfeedthetroll #
  • A 4-5-1 with Spearing holding, Shelvey & Henderson in the middle and Maxi & Bellamy supporting Carroll makes the most sense. #
  • Though it is an XI that absolutely reeks of saving players for the Semi on Saturday. Hopeful we can still get a result. #
  • @Emperor_Kenzo we've played well most the season, winning has been the issue though. #
  • Good start so far, I must say. More play like that and we'll be fine tonight. #
  • Cant comment on Doni's ability but the sleeves on his shirt are far, far too short. #
  • Some decent football so far, lack of penetration so far. Poor defending from Flanaghan though. #
  • And as I type about lack of penetration, Maxi scores a tap-in. Am about a minute behind #damnyouskygo #
  • Play the Maxi and he will score. #
  • Shelvey & Henderson in the middle are, so far, looking absolutely awesome together. Both could potentially be Gerrard's replacement. #
  • Hate to say it but Flanno off is the right decision. Come on Brad, do us proud fella. #
  • Someone should have told Yakubu that the reward for scoring was a box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts. He'd have absolutely smashed it then. #
  • You leave any player, even Yakubu, that free in the area, they'll punish you. Poor from #LFC #
  • Thank the lord that's over. I'm spent. Wait, there's a second half? #
  • Yakubu's penalty may have been poor but it still needed saving. Could make a huge difference in an hour's time. #
  • Going to do a Storify "story" of tonight's game later. Might take me as long as the game itself to type it up properly.. #
  • Not that you type a Storify story but still ALOT to report on. #
  • Right, let's try again shall we? #
  • My brother in law has just suggested that Daniel Agger looks like The Miz. Well, he is awesome. #workwithwhatimgiven #
  • Craig Bellamy's training session with Tom Daley earlier was well worth it then? #bitobviouscraig #
  • Wrong end Andy. #
  • Andy Carroll, you gorgeous lanky Geordie. #
  • I presume BRFC fans are back to their routine of hating Steve Kean again? #
  • Andy Burton interviewing Kenny; always good for a laugh… #
  • Coming to DVD in June; the best of Kenny Dalglish vs Andy Burton, Vol. 1. #

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The day in tweets for 2012-04-09 from The Smiling Assassin

  • Haven't seen any of yesterday's game but presume I can just repeat what I said last week? And the week before that? And the one before that? #
  • #4wordsyoudontwanttohear Get in the hole #masters #
  • I appear to be in the process of writing my first proper blog post in 2 years. I might even finish too. #
  • WordPress ipad app has just managed to lose an hours work I put into that blog post. Absolutely gutted. #
  • Aplogies for this but I hope the people who wrote the WordPress app and their entire families all die of AIDS. Fucking livid right now. #
  • Not suggesting what I wrote was any good but not really the point is it? Still, for free what else do you expect but a shitty app. #
  • Apologies for the swearing earlier. Think I've mentally recovered everything I'd written. The #masters playoff appears to be calming me down #
  • That black guy at the #masters didn't stick out at all then, did he? #

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The week in tweets for this past week from The Smiling Assassin

  • Newcastle are having a good season but challenge will be for them to do the same next season. #
  • The Premier League, and football in general, is littered with one season wonders. Pardew himself had one good season with West Ham. #
  • And given that NUFC fans believe their side should win the league but also the World Cup, be a challenge for Pardew to control expectations. #
  • Some interesting responses to my NUFC tweets yesterday. Opinion divided between they'll do well and will struggle next season. #
  • Don't think they'll crash and burn but Pardew will have to do wonders if he's to finish in top 6 & have a decent run in Europe. #
  • And I agree with what @__Quattro said yesterday, a smug Alan Pardew is not a pretty sight. Possibly not so smug this time next year. #
  • Don't hate #NUFC at all, clearly having a good season, but you know that their fans are going to let one good season go to their heads. #
  • @AttackoftheKop Spurs have had a few good seasons in fairness but take your point. #
  • Another reason to discuss NUFC is that it was 16 years ago today that we had that epic 4-3 game against them. #
  • Which is the only complete football match I actually own on DVD. Still an epic game 16 years on. #
  • @zarifrasul didn't he do some work for the BBC during the last World Cup? #
  • @LFCTS I agree, a start wouldn't hurt at all. Might actually provide some quality from the wings for once too. #
  • If only we had one available to us….. RT @AttackoftheKop Suarez needs a big man next to him. #
  • Haven't seen any of yesterday's game but presume I can just repeat what I said last week? And the week before that? And the one before that? #
  • #4wordsyoudontwanttohear Get in the hole #masters #
  • I appear to be in the process of writing my first proper blog post in 2 years. I might even finish too. #
  • WordPress ipad app has just managed to lose an hours work I put into that blog post. Absolutely gutted. #
  • Aplogies for this but I hope the people who wrote the WordPress app and their entire families all die of AIDS. Fucking livid right now. #
  • Not suggesting what I wrote was any good but not really the point is it? Still, for free what else do you expect but a shitty app. #

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The day in tweets for 2012-04-08 from The Smiling Assassin

  • If only we had one available to us….. RT @AttackoftheKop Suarez needs a big man next to him. #

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